Have you heard who`s in town?
THE MOSCOW FOOLS
On Saturday October 25th 2008 I offered to hand in my resignation as Chairman of Glasgow`s Famous Gallon Club. I feel as if I've let down the club and it`s membership.
I should have been a better ambassador for the Club and accept that the amount of alcohol consumed should not be used as an excuse. I would like to take this opportunity to apologise to all concerned .
It all started when Glasgow `s Famous Gallon Club decided to do the Gallon in Russia .
Moscow seemed the most suitable venue. Rumours of beer at £6 a pint led to larger than normal beer money being required.
Only three members made the trip behind the Iron Curtain.
The rest were at home ironing their curtains.
We left the Hotel Milan after a large breakfast . Memories went back to the time when Andy in Belfast struggled to find the difference between a large breakfast and a small breakfast . The Irish waitress help him by saying it was the size you idiot . She followed it up by saying "and they say the Irish are stupid ".
METRO
Our hotel was a good bit out of the centre of Moscow . So we had to use the world famous Metro .
Nine stops and we are near to Red Square.
We started the day with a small refreshment on a park bench round from Red square .
I explain to the Vice Chairman this is not the best thing for a tourist to do especially as two Russian police officers were standing a few yards away . GB states that it was what the locals did so its only right we join in. Luckly the police move on.
I didn`t fancy digging for salt for the next few years .
We head round to Red Square. Red Square is one of those places that you see on TV and wonder if it would be as spectacular in real life. It is.
Red Square is the most famous city square in Moscow, and arguably one of the most famous in the world. The square separates the Kremlin, the former Royal Citadel and is currently the official residence of the President of Russia, from a historic merchant quarter known as Kitay-gorod. As major streets of Moscow radiate from here in all directions, being promoted to major highways outside the city the Red Square is often considered the central square of Moscow and of all Russia.
Saint Basil's Cathedral Red Square Photo taken by gb pic ltd
After a few hours siteseeing we decided to head to the GUM department
store .
The ornate Neo-Russian facade of GUM, Moscow's "State Department Store", takes up almost the entire eastern side of Red Square. Built between 1890 and 1893 by Alexander Pomerantsev, the building features an interesting combination of elements of Russian medieval ecclesiastical architecture and an elegant steel framework and glass roof, reminiscent of the great turn of the century train stations of Paris and London. This modern 3-story arcade is the largest shop in Moscow and was built to replace the old hall of the Upper Trading Rows, which existed earlier on the same site but burnt down in 1825. The original hall contained some 1,200 separate shops and stalls and was one of Moscow's liveliest markets.
At the top of The Gum is No57
Glasgow`s Famous Gallon Club has travelled the globe doing pubcrawls in all kinds of different countries . The beer in No 57 was cheap for Moscow .
£1.50 a pint . Killie Jim decided to try the locals favourite [Russian Vodka]
Beer after beer THE GALLON was done around tea time .
We decided to leave No 57 and head to the Arbat by this time we had
swallow the Dirty Dozen beer and we were all in good spirits.
Jim the KING OF VODKA`S had 12 straight vodies .
KING OF VODKA
We decide to stop at a small bar on the way. That was a fatal mistake. Two beers later GB suggested as we are in Russia it`s only right we try a local drink. As the picture below shows we really enjoy the Russian Vodka.
aw naw thats was good
Thanks to the bar staff for taking the photo. The rest of the day is a blurr.
I look over to GB and think to myself I better get him home he looks
p----d . I better go to the toilet first. 15 mins later THE KING OF THE VODKA WAKES ME UP ON THE PAN. [flanks very moch Jimbo I say]
By this time we decide to call a cab. GB says lets getting fluckin faxi back to flotel. The king of Vodka translates to the bar staff.
All of a sudden there`s a loud noise and I look round Gee blee is LYING ON THE FLOOR .
What the fluck are you doooin doon there Gee blee I ask the vice chairman. I Flokin fell he screams.
By this time walking seems like being on a roller coaster .
The Taxi arrives and we wander outside. The king of Vodka helps GB up and into the Taxi. By this time I have decided to head off on my own.
The king of Vodka`s stops me heading towards St. Petersburg and chases after me turns me round and I head back to the cab.
As the king helps me into the taxi he falls and thumps his chin off the pavement hurts his hand and back. All part of being a member of GFGC.
Taxi races off to the hotel with the passengers starting to talk like dogs in the back, ruff ruff and ruff ruff was heard. KIND OF DOG TALK
Very hard to explain.
At Hotel I head like a topedo back to my room.
As Chairman of Glasgow`s Famous Gallon Club it is not acceptable that I should be heading back to the hotel nine o clock at night while the rest of the city is still enjoying themselves till the wee small hours. I can assure the membership it will never happen again. Thanks to Mr Bryden for producing the photographic evidence.
At three o`clock in the morning the Vice Chairman was awakened by the sound of " MY DRINK WAS SPIKED".
Go back to sleep you looney.